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Couples trading partners

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Instead, it was almost as if each party took turns upping the ante. To a degree, threesomes with other women had been Emily's way of buying more sexual freedom.

Eventually Paul became the guy Emily did those things with, unaware that his wife had already been a sexual guest in Emily's marriage.

Upon looking back, neither Emily nor Paul can quite remember how he learned the backstory. When she did, Paul was angry: at Amanda for cheating, and at Mark — a man he called a friend — for nailing his wife behind his back.

But here's the rub: By the time the secret came out, Paul had already developed feelings for Emily. He didn't want to stop seeing her. Which is, of course, where the waters got extremely murky.

Each pair stayed married, but the four continued to swing regularly. It began to run their lives. Why such an addiction? The mixed-and-matched couples would spend entire weekends holed up in hotel rooms, separated from their spouses for long hours.

Emily and Paul let down their emotional guard. It didn't seem normal. The couples knew they probably should set some rules, but fun got in the way.

Eventually the turmoil became too much, and in , both Emily and Paul divorced their spouses and began dating each other. Emily describes the divorces as devastating for everyone, including their families.

Still, married since , both Emily and Paul feel rock-solid in their commitment today. Emily, now 34, concurs that this marriage is sturdier than her first.

Of course, that may be due, in part, to the fact that they've put swinging aside. But while Emily and Paul have been monogamous since they've been together, they know sexual exploration will re-enter the picture at some point.

It's simply part of who they are. Emily agrees. Still, because of the bizarre circumstances under which they came together, Emily and Paul now understand the importance of staying emotionally connected, no matter what's happening physically.

Both agree boundaries must be set. That's it. I have no desire to separate [from Emily]. My 20s were kind of a free-for-all. But now I'd want to set limits on how much time we'd spend with another couple, and put our relationship first.

I'm definitely committed to this relationship more so than I was the last one, so I would set more rules. For the couple, communication is key.

The couple we'd been interested in didn't show, so we were thinking we probably wouldn't get involved with the others there, that we'd just watch and just stick with each other.

At the last minute, a different couple arrived that hadn't made it to the pub, we liked the look of them straight away and ended up doing a soft swap.

Soft swap typically refers to non-penetrative sex between exchanging couples or swapping where the men do not partake. People don't understand the reality of it.

I don't think you'd ever reach the level of intimacy or intensity that two people alone in a room reach. So the sex is much less tied into emotion, if you could imagine sex as a sport, rather than an intimate relationship, you'd probably have a better idea of what it's like.

I love the attention and I've been getting great feedback from people at the parties, that's really helped me to feel more attractive and comfortable with my own body.

You have to have respect for existing swingers. It's true that people are welcome to come to watch, there's no obligation to get involved, but, at the same time, it's not a spectator sport.

Personally, I don't mind people watching, but I wouldn't want to feel like I was an exhibit in a zoo either. I'd want to know that the people watching were there for enjoyment, not to 'watch the freaks' or laugh.

Things aren't necessarily discussed upfront. Everyone is generally very respectful and watches body language carefully. When approaching a couple or group, they approach slowly.

The people involved have the opportunity to indicate their interest or lack of it with body language or even verbally.

But from what I've seen so far, it would be hard to develop that close bond in a party situation. For me, I only experience jealousy about things my partner does when I'm not around, so to avoid this, we have a 'look but not touch' agreement for when I'm not around, and I trust him implicitly.

We also have an agreement that we will only enter into sexual relations with others that we both approve of. So, when meeting couples online, we review their pictures and make our decision together, and at parties we check everyone out and discuss who we're attracted to.

It may just be one phase of our relationship. In my opinion, relationships require change as you go through life, to reflect the changing needs of both parties, so there may well be times when we don't swing and I'm sure at some stage we'll stop altogether.

I must say, I 'm amazed at how many people are involved in the swinging scene in Ireland, although we've been told that people come and go quite quickly.

And we get to be in a serious relationship without having to give up the sex life of a single person, allowing a more interesting sex life. I mean even if you're not particularly attracted to most of the people at parties, you're still surrounded by people having sex, so it gets you horny.

When you go home with your partner then you have great sex. As we were chatting another couple, who'd been swinging for years, joined us.

The foreign girl introduced me to them and said they swing regularly with this couple. Listening to the four of them chat was for all the world like listening to four best buddies catching up, the only exception being that these people openly swap partners.

The girls were organising to meet for a coffee at the weekend and the guys were chatting about the four of them going racing on Friday week.

The conversation leaped from one thing to another, and ended where a lot of conversations end, with the big three-letter-word -- sex.

They started scanning the room to pick out who they wanted in their group orgy and when they selected a group that pleased them all, they headed off in convoy to one of the rooms and closed the door so unwelcome outsiders wouldn't feel free to join in the orgy.

Needless to say, we were invited, but we declined. When the door closed on their orgy we took that as our cue to go. But, if you dive straight in, you'll probably only come across mermaids and life guards.

The day after the party I met up with him on his lunch break and was shocked by the transformation. I was standing face to face with this sharp, smartly dressed banker in his pristine suit who I'd seen the night before strutting around naked, putting on and off condoms.

We sat down at a corner table and ordered broccoli salads, and he tried to sell the concept of swinging to me as we ate. The beauty of swinging is, you can have sex with randomers and when you leave the party, they're gone from your life and you don't have to ever see them again.

It's exciting: it's like a lucky bag -- you never know what you're going to get. Although, one strict policy I enforce is that single men are not welcome, simply because if a guy is with his partner he's under her control.

I have certain criteria and standards for the people I want at my parties. But I must say, at an orgy, attitude scores higher than looks.

If someone is a size 16 and they are mad up for it and eager to experiment, they'd be a lot more fun and use to you than a waif who is very choosy -- no offence to you or anything," he said as he tapped my leg, "but a bunch of people standing around looking beautiful isn't much good at a swinging party.

The Irish phenomenon of cyber swinging never ceases to amaze me. People are obviously interested in it, but many of them can't go beyond the internet phase.

They prefer to swap pictures and chat online because they are afraid to go ahead with it. What's the point spending time on a swinging website if you are not going to swing?

It's like drinking non-alcoholic wine -- it has no effect and you'd be better off spending your time doing something else. Go to a party, have a drink, have some fun with your own partner, get off on the surroundings and, if you're not comfortable enough to join in, then leave.

At least experience it in the flesh before you make a judgement on it. It's better to try something out while you can, rather than being 70 and sitting in a wheelchair or hobbling around using a Zimmer frame full of regret.

People travel from all over the country to attend the parties I host. It's a form of escapism, a chance for people to live out their fantasies in a safe environment with their partners there.

I mean, it doesn't develop into a gang bang or anything -- unless a girl requests two guys she won't get it. It's one place where sexual fantasies become a reality.

A lot of girls go to these parties to explore their bisexual side. Even the ones that are convinced they are completely straight are found with their heads nestled between another girl's legs by the end of the night.

His final comment was that: "Although swinging is completely legal, those of us involved in the scene in Ireland don't feel prepared to reveal ourselves publicly as we are all professional people.

We live in communities and have families and need to protect our employers, families and friends from perceived shame. His final comment rang in my ears for a while.

Why does swinging have such negative connotations here in Ireland? What do we have against couples who openly, honestly and maturely practice safe sex with other consenting adults in a safe environment?

From my research, I found that swingers could be anyone, from any social, economic or ethnic group. And I think the stereotypical image of swingers as sleazy, perverse, untrustworthy, middle-aged and often overweight doesn't paint a fair picture.

Everyone I spoke to feared being "outed" in the paper, feeling they'd be pinned up against the wall and that everyone would point a finger at them and whisper.

Should these people be judged by their actions in the bedroom, which are not illegal? There are no swinger clubs in Ireland since Lover's Leap in Wicklow closed.

However, swinger clubs are popping up all over the world and the word on the street is that no swinger should die without experiencing Cap D'Agde naturist resort in France.

With eight swinger clubs, two of which are considered the very best in the world, Le Glamour and L'Extasia, it's no wonder it's been renamed the swinger's summer capital.

France as a country is laid-back in its attitude to sex and nudity and tens of thousands of cosmopolitan libertines migrate to this resort over the summer months for sexual adventures.

Hmm, perhaps a feature on the more glamorous side of swinging is in the pipeline. Trading partners.

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As we were chatting another couple, who'd been swinging for years, joined us. The foreign girl introduced me to them and said they swing regularly with this couple.

Listening to the four of them chat was for all the world like listening to four best buddies catching up, the only exception being that these people openly swap partners.

The girls were organising to meet for a coffee at the weekend and the guys were chatting about the four of them going racing on Friday week.

The conversation leaped from one thing to another, and ended where a lot of conversations end, with the big three-letter-word -- sex. They started scanning the room to pick out who they wanted in their group orgy and when they selected a group that pleased them all, they headed off in convoy to one of the rooms and closed the door so unwelcome outsiders wouldn't feel free to join in the orgy.

Needless to say, we were invited, but we declined. When the door closed on their orgy we took that as our cue to go.

But, if you dive straight in, you'll probably only come across mermaids and life guards. The day after the party I met up with him on his lunch break and was shocked by the transformation.

I was standing face to face with this sharp, smartly dressed banker in his pristine suit who I'd seen the night before strutting around naked, putting on and off condoms.

We sat down at a corner table and ordered broccoli salads, and he tried to sell the concept of swinging to me as we ate. The beauty of swinging is, you can have sex with randomers and when you leave the party, they're gone from your life and you don't have to ever see them again.

It's exciting: it's like a lucky bag -- you never know what you're going to get. Although, one strict policy I enforce is that single men are not welcome, simply because if a guy is with his partner he's under her control.

I have certain criteria and standards for the people I want at my parties. But I must say, at an orgy, attitude scores higher than looks. If someone is a size 16 and they are mad up for it and eager to experiment, they'd be a lot more fun and use to you than a waif who is very choosy -- no offence to you or anything," he said as he tapped my leg, "but a bunch of people standing around looking beautiful isn't much good at a swinging party.

The Irish phenomenon of cyber swinging never ceases to amaze me. People are obviously interested in it, but many of them can't go beyond the internet phase.

They prefer to swap pictures and chat online because they are afraid to go ahead with it. What's the point spending time on a swinging website if you are not going to swing?

It's like drinking non-alcoholic wine -- it has no effect and you'd be better off spending your time doing something else. Go to a party, have a drink, have some fun with your own partner, get off on the surroundings and, if you're not comfortable enough to join in, then leave.

At least experience it in the flesh before you make a judgement on it. It's better to try something out while you can, rather than being 70 and sitting in a wheelchair or hobbling around using a Zimmer frame full of regret.

People travel from all over the country to attend the parties I host. It's a form of escapism, a chance for people to live out their fantasies in a safe environment with their partners there.

I mean, it doesn't develop into a gang bang or anything -- unless a girl requests two guys she won't get it. It's one place where sexual fantasies become a reality.

A lot of girls go to these parties to explore their bisexual side. Even the ones that are convinced they are completely straight are found with their heads nestled between another girl's legs by the end of the night.

His final comment was that: "Although swinging is completely legal, those of us involved in the scene in Ireland don't feel prepared to reveal ourselves publicly as we are all professional people.

We live in communities and have families and need to protect our employers, families and friends from perceived shame. His final comment rang in my ears for a while.

Why does swinging have such negative connotations here in Ireland? What do we have against couples who openly, honestly and maturely practice safe sex with other consenting adults in a safe environment?

From my research, I found that swingers could be anyone, from any social, economic or ethnic group. And I think the stereotypical image of swingers as sleazy, perverse, untrustworthy, middle-aged and often overweight doesn't paint a fair picture.

Everyone I spoke to feared being "outed" in the paper, feeling they'd be pinned up against the wall and that everyone would point a finger at them and whisper.

Should these people be judged by their actions in the bedroom, which are not illegal? There are no swinger clubs in Ireland since Lover's Leap in Wicklow closed.

However, swinger clubs are popping up all over the world and the word on the street is that no swinger should die without experiencing Cap D'Agde naturist resort in France.

With eight swinger clubs, two of which are considered the very best in the world, Le Glamour and L'Extasia, it's no wonder it's been renamed the swinger's summer capital.

France as a country is laid-back in its attitude to sex and nudity and tens of thousands of cosmopolitan libertines migrate to this resort over the summer months for sexual adventures.

Hmm, perhaps a feature on the more glamorous side of swinging is in the pipeline. Trading partners. Close 'There are roughly couples who swing in Ireland.

When she did, Paul was angry: at Amanda for cheating, and at Mark — a man he called a friend — for nailing his wife behind his back.

But here's the rub: By the time the secret came out, Paul had already developed feelings for Emily.

He didn't want to stop seeing her. Which is, of course, where the waters got extremely murky. Each pair stayed married, but the four continued to swing regularly.

It began to run their lives. Why such an addiction? The mixed-and-matched couples would spend entire weekends holed up in hotel rooms, separated from their spouses for long hours.

Emily and Paul let down their emotional guard. It didn't seem normal. The couples knew they probably should set some rules, but fun got in the way.

Eventually the turmoil became too much, and in , both Emily and Paul divorced their spouses and began dating each other.

Emily describes the divorces as devastating for everyone, including their families. Still, married since , both Emily and Paul feel rock-solid in their commitment today.

Emily, now 34, concurs that this marriage is sturdier than her first. Of course, that may be due, in part, to the fact that they've put swinging aside.

But while Emily and Paul have been monogamous since they've been together, they know sexual exploration will re-enter the picture at some point.

It's simply part of who they are. Emily agrees. Still, because of the bizarre circumstances under which they came together, Emily and Paul now understand the importance of staying emotionally connected, no matter what's happening physically.

Both agree boundaries must be set. Two middle-aged couples are linked by more than just a lifelong friendship. While relaxing on a Caribbean island, they get an unconventional idea to enrich and, as a result, complicate their sexual lives.

Votes: Not Rated 87 min Comedy, Drama, Romance. Julie and David have been married for 6 years. Julie is needing a spark to ignite their passion they once had and when she runs into their mutual old friend Marc and his new free spirit R min Drama, Romance.

R min Drama. R 93 min Crime, Drama, Thriller. A husband and wife, dissatisfied with their banal suburban existence, take a walk on the wild side one night with a couple they meet at the Zebra Lounge.

Votes: 1, Three couples travel to a secluded cabin in an attempt to revitalize their lives through bizarre games of sexual dysfunction Tous publics min Drama.

2 Comments

  1. Dailrajas JoJozuru

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  2. Bajas Faezragore

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